The Child of Spirit

10:29pm: *Thud* *Crash* *BOOM* Rargh hargh harggrrrrr...
Today and Yesterday I was up at granny's (who is smelly and unclean, urgh) getting plowed into her garden... Which is horrendously overgrown... I got bitten, scratched, covered in gunk and trod on an assortment of rusty, sharp objects :(... In this jungle of a garden we found an entire set of cast iron furniture about 30 years old, a vacuum cleaner from pre-history, 2 bird cages, 3 hamster cages (all minus animals, thankfully), a barbecue, 6 old Calor Gas canisters (eeep!) and an old car tyre... Not to mention a wide selection of other nasties, hinestly I saw a spider so big it probably caught aeroplanes in it's web... I did see a groovy little toad though... It tok one look at crazed, muddy me and looked away in disgust... Never have I seen such a look of disdain on the face of an amphibian... it was quite fun though... Considering I got to demolish an old shed and garage with a sledgehammer (*sings* Sledgehammer!)... And when I came home I had a looong bath and came out 3 inches shorter after washing all the grime off...
Got back into my cards today... It's been a while since I used them so I'm just getting used to them... I ran through the Major Arcana earlier so I'll look at the Minor later, and try and discern what's going on in my love life *sigh*... My meditation has improved as well thanks to the tape I got from Rose, the woman who runs the Spiritualist Church and my teacher...
Ah well... Fare thee well and Sweet, vibrant dreams to all!!!

5:08pm: Damnation and Buggery...
Today I got all fired up to ask Lesley out... I planned iwhat I would say and minced off to work feeling like a knight Errant off to meet his sweetheart and whisk her off her feet... However, when I arrived I found the bloody shop bloody well shut and there was sign of niether hide nor hair of anyone at all... Which means either they've decieded to just have the day off or something bad has happened... I would prefer the former... Not only for the fact that I don't want anything bad to happen but it feels so shallow to sit and seethe in the face of tragedy... Ah well, my love must go unrequited for now... Bugger.

2:14am: Woe is Me...
Lesley! The name is music to my ears... I love my witch, yet I am completely incabable of telling her how I do... I *think* she feels the same, but what if she doesn't... I wan't to ask her, hold her, be with her... But... I don't know, I DO know there's only one way to find out, though... I think she's working on Saturday with me... I'll try and pluck up the courage before then... God! I'm so hopeless... I suck...

1:00am: Aaah sweet, sweet AZUK, how sorely I missed you...
I finally got around to getting back on the AZUK forums after Aurora's Boy Appeared in a puff of smoke on MSN... (all my friends got wiped so I aint got any AZUK peoples left anymore *sniff*)... But I'm back and already I've fell in love once again with the sheer randomity of the forums... I missed them dearly...

A man in the wilderness
Asked this of me
"How many strawberrys
Grow in the sea?"
I answered him
As I thought I should
"As many red herrings
As swim in the wood"

heh heh...

3:14pm: Awwwwan ickle baby!!!
Awwww diddums... Don't dat just beat all?

11:47pm: Dull, dull, dull, dull....
Today was rather dull (you may have guessed)as I've not went anywhere or done anything... that's right I'm a sad lonely hermit with no friends... Boo Hoo Hooo!!! Well not really I just feel rather scuzzish at the moment - Throat infection, Euch! I've not been helping by singing all the day long (I had headphones in so at least I didn't have to listen to it)!
The only real points of interest of today was when the knife (It's real Purdy) I ordered finally arrived, unfortunately that means I have to pay for it now but, ah well!

9:17pm: The time has come he Walrus said....
To think of many things... Chris (A friend indeed) and I skipped to Falkirk today and since no-one else turned up we happily mooched around talking and worrying the locals... Chris decieded to get pierced (I decieded to get pierced more) so that's something to look forward to...
I'm currently barred up in my bedroom with some cannabis scented incense raging at my dear sweet mother for quite casually reading all my private text messages... Grrrr
I'm also in love! I never knew it was like this... My usual extrovertiveness simply wilts in her face and I become powerless to her charms... Unfortunately I haven't plucked up the courage to ask her out of course, I think she likes me... But I am Captain Wuss-Out when it comes to things with this sort of kidneys... It's a strange feeling to know you love someone... I mean I've had crushes before and God knows I've been in lust a hell of a lot of times to but love, well it's strange that's all I can say... Nice but strange...
I'm also very very very happy... I'm not too sure why but it's fantastically fantastic... I really do feel like I'm going to explode... Watch for me on the news peeps (Spontaneous Human Explosion)... Actually, I'd rather like to die through spontaneous human combustion... Not that I want to die but when my time comes it would be cool... It's quick, you don't have to pay for cremation but best of all is the fact that you burst into flames with no possible explanation!!! Huzzah! Fare thee well, Friends! I hope you all have happy times!

2:10am: Random Monty Python Quotes (Get used to them)
It is a good shrubbery. I like the laurels particularly. But there is one small problem.
What is that?
We are now... no longer the Knights Who Say Nee.
Nee!
Shh shh. We are now the Knights Who Say Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoom-boing-mumble-mumble
Nee!
Therefore, we must give you a test.
What is this test, O Knights of-- Knights Who 'Til Recently Said Nee?
Firstly, you must find... another shrubbery! [dramatic chord]
Not another shrubbery!
Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must place it here beside this shrubbery, only slightly higher so you get a two-level effect with a little path running down the middle.
A path! A path! Nee!
Then, when you have found the shrubbery, you must cut down the mightiest tree in the forest... with... a herring! [dramatic chord]

This sums me up all over... O.o

1:22am: Anyone played Startopia?

12:55am: Back in the Good Moods
Ok I'm back and this time I intend to stay (blessing/curse???) I am now officially a Happy Camper and I intend to be forevermore... My recent questioning of my faith has been overturned when the question I had been begging for an answer for was indeed mightily answered by the happy happy medium at the church on Friday... It's truly amazing how bright the colours are when you're happy... Especially if you've been through a dark patch in your life, but once it's over the colours flood back...
My lip (I got it pierced [the bottom lip to the right]) has finally stopped oozing worryingly and is beggining to look ok. I picked up a guitar in a charity shop for 5 squids, so watch out for me when I'm a famously famous musician in years to come... Once I've actually learned to play that is O.o... Although none of these happy things compare to my shoes... Aaaah, sweet, sweet shoes... Well trainers actually. Now picture this...
Take an ordinary (rather scruffy) pair of Nike trainers... Paint them tourqoise... Add liberal splashes of pink... Take a thin paintbrush... Flick Green, Red and Orange Paint all over... Paint the Soles Blue... Take some glitter (red,green,blue,purple and gold) add liberally... voila! My sweet, sweet shoes, my pride and joy, my (dare I say it) babies!... I need a life!
Coincedentally does anyone know if you can make a living selling sperm? Just out of cuiriosity you understand... And does anyone know any good jobs, I seriously need to think about my career... Or severe lack of one! Hmmm... Not worth losing sleep over (Am I losing sleep over it though [I am sitting up writing about it after all...])? Indeed? Ah well... Oh I forgot to mention I finally got a hold of The Wee Free Men (Nae King, Nae Qeuin, Nae Laird, Nae Master... We'll no be fooled again [The Nac Mac Feegle - Thrown out of the fairy realm for being drunk and disorderly]) and believe me, if you like Prattchet you'll love it(especially if you love zany Scots accents)

9:16pm: I don't know
Well...
I know I haven't updated in a while but no one really reads this anyway... I just wanted to blow off a little steam really. I broke up with Fiona, not that it was going anywhere anyway. I think she just wanted a boyfriend because all her friends have them and I was convenient... We had nothing in common either. My life is pretty confusing right now. I've been questioning my faith and beliefs quite fruequently and my thoughts have begun getting quite disturbing and shocking... I just want to cry right now and I don't really know why. Things are a lot better than they have been and my life is taking on a new direction so I should be happy. I've been learning quite a bit about the things that interest me, mainly the Paranormal and Spiritualism... I am in fact going to a Psychic fair this weekend. I'm hoping to become a member of the Scottish Psychical Research Center so I should hopefully continue to learn.
Life is strange. And human beings are stranger. Why do so many hurt and steal and commit treachery and betrayal and crime? What purpose does it serve? I'm sorry... I just see no need for hurting other people. Sometimes you just wish there was something you could do. It makes you feel so impotent when you hear of all the hurt in the world. This is perhaps the reason I question my faith, If it is indeed so hard to believe in human beings how am I supposed to believe in God. I am confused and depressed but it does feel beter to let off some steam. Sometimes humanity gets me down. But what can I do? I'm sorry. I shouldn't inflict my woes on the internet... I don't want anyone else to feel sad now do I? It's not like they can churn out their happy pills for the whole world. There has to be some other way of getting over this. Docters just don't understand... I'm sorry I just needed to write it down and let it out. I don't know when I'll update again... Probably not too soon anyway.

7:08pm: Even more Huzzahs than the last update...
Super Huzzah... Today I got a voluntary job in a shop down the town... The voluntary (is that how you spell it?) bit means that i don't get paid but super mega ultra huzzah since I'll be getting paid in the hard currency of knowledge. The shop sell crystals, herbs and oils and things, which I yearn to learn about, and what a better place to learn? I also get a discount on the merchandise and courses which gets a big YAY. I am now in an ecstatic frame of mind *dances a happy little jig* and methinks I'm going to see The Matrix Reloaded tonight... In less in an hour actually. Yet another huzzah today. And as if to make the world all happy and glowy I'm meeting Fiona tomorrow. Huzzzzaaaaaaah!!! Things are finally looking up and up and up some more. See yall later now.

3:17pm: DOUBLE TRIPLE McHUZZAH WITH FRIES
NO MORE STINKING GERMAN... EVER!!! Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha... Finally the moment I've waited for is here and the bane of my existance is thwarted now once and for all... HUZZAH!!!
Forgot to update Yesterday but nothing really happened anyway, I did however flick through the pages of a library book to find a condom (still in the packaging, thankfully) tucked neatly away between the pages. Lovely.
Today's been quite dull since I've only really been at school for my German exam (the last german I'll ever do). The fire alarm went off during one of them though, so I fashioned a laurel wreath from a hedge while we waited and managed to wear it for 15 minutes before the examiner removed it from me. :(
Goodbye, So long and fare thee well...

11:08pm: So Tired...
Good Grief... Today's been a big lazy git day for me today, I've been struggling to stay awake all day. What makes it worse is that I've got a lovely big physics exam tomorrow and, me being me I've put off all my revision to today and since I've slept all day I've done no revision. Shit. Oh well, what can you do... Well, apart from failing your exams and spending your life in a dead end job. Double shit. Got exams on Tuesday and Wednesday as well... I'm going into the town with Fiona on Thursday :)... First time we'll get to see each other properly since we started going out. And now I'm going to my bed so wish me luck with my exams tomorrow... Nighty Night.

9:29pm: This is just what I need...

schizotypal


Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

Don't that just go beat all? Now I feel even worse because I've been having conversations in my head recently. Does this mean I'm becoming schizophrenic. Great, just great.

9:18am: My teeth hurt...
I awoke this morning greeted by birdsong and the wind blowing through the trees... But I couldn't appreciate any of it because I was an arse last night and drank too much... So I lay in the foetal position until the world became a better place, I've managed to pry my head from the pillow but for some strange reason my teeth are really painful.
My family reunion could have been worse, at least there was no fighting and things went quite smoothly. I met my cousin Lynne, whom I had only ever spoken to on the internet and a lot of other relatives I never knew and can't remember. I did meet a young cousin (I think) named Robbie and he amused himself by kicking me in all evening, in a friendly sort of way. I did see another little git though. This one is called Stuart but Damien would be more appropriate. He spent his night charging around, telling Lynne and myself to F*** off and then going to his mum and telling her that we were swearing at him. Of course, being the doting mother she believed her son and came at me pointing her finger in my face while he sat behind her laughing... Which pissed me off tremendously.
As the night progressed I turned my hand to the kareoke (as you can see this was a wild party... I think not) and sung Build Me Up Buttercup and Bohemian Rhapsody, both of which I slaughtered. When I got home I thought it would be an idea to update my journal which resulted in the atrocity which had to be deleted for decency's sake.
I think that I've realised my greatest fear this morning, looking at my drunken ramblings from the previous night... Ramblings that normally wouldn't occur to me. I think I'm scared of losing myself. Losing myself and becoming someone else, not through experience and growth but from different sources... I think perhaps my greatest fear is that I simply cease to exist.

1:32am: sorry
please ignore this post.

1:47pm: Well, well, well...
Well, well, well... It seems like I've finally got a LiveJournal (no, really?) and as if in spite absolutely nothing has happened today. Ah well, this is just a practice post anyway. Maybe something exciting will happen tonight, I'm going to a family reunion... *groan*